Finding a peace of mind

Basically I slept super late because for some reason I could not fall asleep, and then…

I WOKE UP AT FUCKING 10AM.

I literally only had five hours of sleep, and for the rest of the day I was in a foul mood.

Of course life could not go on like that, so in the late afternoon I washed up and went for a quick workout at the park nearby, and after trying to do some exercises, I decided that I was too tired and lazy for that shit, and instead, sat down to meditate. Good thing I had my mp3 player with me, and I was on top of a hill, so the setting was perfect. I spent a good 15 minutes just listening to music and letting my mind settle, and after that, the world felt like a better place even though some of the park-goers were staring at me curiously.

And then I remembered what I had said yesterday, about me doing yoga in an open space, and that’s exactly what I decided to do after that short meditation session. Stretching out here and there, getting into some poses, and a little while later, I was a zen little creature, floating in the air and drifting about aimlessly until I reached home and had to get ready for class.

Class was nothing out of the ordinary except that the school ordered pizza for us, which was alright. I am not too crazy about pizza but I took a nice fat slice anyway.

My enemy Naz is in India and probably got married. This was the conversation we had earlier:

zaraconvo

Okay I am extremely tired and sleepy now and I pray that I don’t wake up early tomorrow.

Adios.

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Why does Yoga make you feel so good?

I found some time to do a bit of yoga today and even though my flexibility is barely there, I felt my stiff joints and some muscles loosen up and relax; for a while after that short yoga session, I felt like I was walking on air and it’s a sensation that I could really get used to in the long run.

My room however is kinda small to do proper yoga, so I should probably join a class or try doing it outdoors when I head out to exercise.

That aside, I bought a whole bunch of junk food on the way home from class. Don’t ask me why. I am not thaaat health conscious so I shouldn’t be feeling guilty either because I eat junk food all the time. But the past few days I had been craving for some good junk food, so today I went on a rampage at the supermarket and bought a bag of Ruffles Potato Chips (love that shit, it’s the best damn thing everrr), two bars of chocolates (because they were on sale!) and a bag of pistachios (I love pistachios).

The pistachios are the unsalted, baked kind, and chocolates are supposed to be good for you (actually I’d eat them even if they were bad for me), and that’s a bit of a consolation for me. But then again, who cares if those are good or bad? I know I don’t! *shrugs*

bdp

Found this image online and it’s extremely hilarious! From now on, this will be the only way I’ll respond to anything and everything stupid! LMAO!

Adios!

Oops

So I woke up this morning and found this on my bedspread:

oops

Part of my tattoo got transferred onto my bedspread presumably because I slept in that position for a long time.

That said, I had a good sleep, and woke up feeling well rested and refreshed. There was no class today, so I had time to do some tidying up and managed to wash up all the plates and cutlery that has been piling up in the sink. Oh, and I managed to squeeze in a bit of exercise time as well and my legs and calves are a little sore (it’s okay legs, you’ll thank me next time).

Classes resume tomorrow onwards for my next module and will carry on till next week.

That aside, I set up a group chat with two of my closest buddies from my college days (we keep in touch every now and then), and it seems like all of us are going through a midlife crisis. Can’t wait to meet them up soon for a good banter session and discuss our sad lives. I just hope that everything goes well for them.

Aaaand it’s time for me to climb into bed once more.

Adios!

The Symbol of Life

My Valentine’s day started out pretty normal.

I had a date with my tattoo artist to touch up my Eye of Horus tattoo that I had gotten in December, and since I was going to get it fixed, I thought to myself, why not get another tattoo?

And that was how I ended up with this beauty above my elbow, somewhere behind my non-existent bicep:

myankhtattoo

I’ve been unlucky in love the past few years; the perfect people are either too far away, or they never ever work out even though we seem so perfectly compatible in the beginning.

That said, I am not desperate for love either. While I still hold on to the hope that someday, somewhere, I will find that special someone that I’ll spend the rest of my life with, for now, I am content with life and all the amazing and unamazing things that it throws at me.

I am thankful for my friends, my family (mostly my mum, even though we hate each other), and some of my relatives and cousins who have always been there for me. I am also thankful that despite all my sinful indulgences (which is waaay too many, I am unashamed to admit), I am still in good health.

All of these are enough for me to celebrate Valentine’s day, because I love my life, and I will not have it any other way. That was the reason why I decided to get the Ankh tattoo which is the ancient Egyptian symbol of life; a reminder to myself of everything that I’ve always taken for granted.

That said, I also wish to apologize to whomever I’ve hurt with my scathing words or actions; I am sorry. I am only human, and I am not perfect. But I learn, and each day, I get better.

***

Class was pretty uneventful, except that it was the last lecture with our dear Mr Ron. Now I just need to pore through my notes, catch up on my reading and get started on my damn assignment. I hope that I can finish earlier this time round.

And I really need some good, restful sleep.

Adios!

Fun Times

My classmates are finally bonding with each other and it’s nice to see everyone helping each other out, especially when it comes to reserving the front row seats during the lectures. Oh, and the endless bitching that goes on in our whatsapp group is something straight out of a television drama, except that it’s like a running live feed, and has been a good entertainment for me for the past few days.

Sadly, this is our final term together, and although it has been a short journey with them, I am starting to wish that I had put in a little effort to get to know these bunch of crazy ladies (I was the only guy enrolled in this intake), and it’s sad to think that just when we have started opening up to each other, our Uni journey is almost coming to an end. That said, I hope that all of us do well enough to earn this degree that we have been working so hard for.

Funny how it felt like a long way when I first enrolled in this institute back in 2014 to pursue a diploma leading up to this degree, and suddenly, I am in my last semester of my degree programme. Time flies and you never realize it.

Besides my graduation, there’s one more thing to look forward to and that is the most impromptu Langkawi trip that my girlfriends and I planned! We started talking about it on Saturday and bham! Tickets were booked on Monday! That’s how fast we roll! The trip is slightly more than three months away and I can hardly wait!

Hope everyone is having a good Valentine’s Day today! Adios! 🙂

A good feeling.

So there is this person that I absolutely hate because this piece of shit is so full of himself, is an arrogant piece of shit and is basically everything that you don’t wanna be.

Unfortunately, I had to breathe in the same air as this piece of shit today, and my good friend and I basically ignored him, because, well, we had an interesting conversation going on about how sad our lives were.

Anyway, this piece of shit had the most disgusting hairstyle, and my friend and I couldn’t help but pass a remark about it among ourselves. The hairstyle was something of a cross between a punk hairstyle and explosive diarrhea, and it was basically screaming for attention, like its owner.

What do I have against this piece of shit? Absolutely nothing. Except that sometimes, you come across certain people and you just hate them for no reason, and then you find out through reliable sources that they are vile and repulsive JUST AS YOU SUSPECTED THAT THEY WERE, and your hatred for them is justified and becomes a matter sealed and set in stone.

That was how it was with this piece of shit. Apparently he’s very successful and is engaged in many business endeavours and blah blah blah.. I don’t care. It’s none of my business. If I hate you, I hate you and it’s as simple as that.

And then there was a moment, which made me realize something.

A moment where I looked up and caught the piece of shit looking at me; for a moment, our eyes locked.

(Fuck you if you thought we fell in love)

It was at that exact moment that I realized that no amount of money or success would make me want to trade places with that piece of shit. ABSOLUTELY NO AMOUNT OF MONEY, FAME OR FORTUNE is enough for me to even consider that ridiculous thought.

And that’s when I realized that I was perfectly happy being myself, jiggly belly, dark circles, flaws and all.

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone. Love yourselves more this year. ❤

Adios.

Oh for fuck’s sake

I will never understand the disdain Malaysian Indian women have for men who take care of themselves.

If you know me, I am extremely anal about personal hygiene and skincare, and the only thing that I spend most on besides food would be my skincare products.. face wash, moisturizers, masks, etc.. you name it and I probably have it.

I believe in taking care of myself physically (as well as mentally), and although you can’t stop ageing, you CAN slow down the process with exercise and adequate use of skincare products; I use sunblock almost on a daily basis.

On a recent visit to the hometown, one relative seemed so bothered that I had better skin than hers. She asked me all sorts of questions on why I use moisturizer and stuff, and the only correct answer I could have given her is

BECAUSE I FUCKING CAN!

And also because I am not a lazy fuck like the majority of Malaysian Indian women who look like shit after they hit their 30s. I take pride in how I look, and I am willing to put in that extra effort to maintain my skin and looks.

Even though my skin isn’t exactly the best, I have very little wrinkles and my skintone is mostly even. This is considering that I am nearly 30 and still break out every now and then.

Sorry if you have shitty skin, but that’s not my fault. Also, stop taking out your insecurities on others who actually care about themselves; they have every right to do whatever the fuck they want, just like you have the right to breathe and judge people and basically be a fucked up person.

#sorrynotsorry

Adios!